Sunday, July 2, 2017

Biblical Backup of Burnout...

I have burn out, especially emotionally. I love
how people thinking living overseas is grand and we just
visit castles and have tons of money. Hardy har har...NO.

Spenser got Norovirus after me and that has made
him have heightened anxiety. Poor guy. This morning at
220am I woke up from a cold dead sleep, figuring he had
screamed out during a panic attack IN HIS SLEEP. Yep. 
It happened. This happens a couple time a week
if not more.

He can't help it. I am just plum wore out these days. Still
no plumber to fix the drain downstairs, the bag of shit (literally)
holding down our roof door. The black out curtain is breaking in
the bedroom. We're the most hillbillified family in Finland I
feel EVER.

I was reading the Bible last night when I got this verse
from Numbers 11: 11

It's about Moses complaining to God because he's 
stressed out and people won't leave him alone.

 He asked the Lord, “Why have you brought this trouble
 on your servant? What have I done to displease you
 that you put the burden of all these people on me? 

12 Did I conceive all these people? Did I give them birth? Why do
 you tell me to carry them in my arms, as a nurse carries 
an infant, to the land you promised on oath to their ancestors? 

13 Where can I get meat for all these people? 
They keep wailing to me, ‘Give us meat to eat!’ 

14 I cannot carry all these people by myself; 
the burden is too heavy for me. 

15 If this is how you are going to treat me, please go ahead
 and kill me—if I have found favor in your eyes—
and do not let me face my own ruin.”

Yeah, Moses was burned out enough that he
asked God to KILL him rather than having to go 
through the trials and tribulations of leading his People.

If you read in Psalms, David seems to have the same thing. He
goes through asking why does stuff like this happen to him and in
the same time having faith that God will take care of it all.

Create in me a pure heart, O God,
    and renew a steadfast spirit within me.

11 Do not cast me from your presence
    or take your Holy Spirit from me.

12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation
    and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.

 - Psalms 51:10

For me this always jumped out as a good prayer
about burn out.  Grant me a willing spirit to sustain me..
that right there says it all.

So many times I've seen and been told that I need to
read Psalms more/quit worrying. It's not that easy and just
today a friend like this article that explains how many
women feel about burn out at home.

I talked about burnout with Spenser and he had a good point,
Jesus asked God in the Garden of Gethsemane if there was any
other way to get what God needed done. Jesus wept. I can't 
fathom what Jesus went through during those hours and times. 
I felt he had burnout knowing what he had to do in the 
end to save mankind from their sinful state.

Burn out happens, it's a state of life for many of us. Unless
you have lots of maids and people working for you, it just 
kind of happens.

It's good to know you're not alone. Caregiving can give
burnout, homemaking, work, etc. If you're prone
to it, make sure to check yourself and your
feelings if you are even starting to feel a hint.

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